1/9/23
Birth of a Star - a moment of Awe
1/8/23
Academic Reading
Print vs e-copy
While text to speech software is great with humanities and a majority of social sciences, they are not as good with science/math textbooks. It can only be a supplement at best for science.
1. Mangles and Winces.
2. Images
In general I find that the text-voice-output is too slow.
When I went to the PD Soros conference in New York last fall, I met another PD Soros fellow at Harvard Law who is also blind. His screen reader plays at 5x speed or more. He explained that he was hearing at the speed of reading with the eyes. That is his ears were acting like his eyes. Apparently, that is perfectly normal in the blind community.
I was rather relieved to know that my asking for a faster text-voice speed is not so unusual after all. And maybe reading much faster like visual scanning is not unusual either. I know my sensory system is all over the place, maybe my senses are compensating too.
Optimize Input-Output Time
A slower output (due to oral motor apraxia, fine motor and other issues) does not have to translate into slower input (absorption of cognitive material). I think that's how I've been able to manage academics time-wise. My output is clumsy and slow but my input is pretty fast. Which is probably the reverse for NT peers. They type away at enviable speeds.
Context and Mood dependent
Autism does not look the same every hour and every day. It's not predictable what the next hour will look like. Sometimes I'm more visual, other days I'm more auditory and some days I need both. Sometimes my mind is tired and sluggish and in a brain fog mode. Lots of causes - maybe a barometric pressure change, med effects, weather, you body just not there. There are days, not much sinks in visually. A text-speech reader of books is definitely helpful in those times as a supplement to tired eyes and tired brain. It's one more modality of input which can definitely help. A slower reader speed can potentially help those times.
Loneliness
Factoring in disability, tends to, I think, further intensift that loneliness because as a disabled person you already were existing on the fringe socially to begin with.
Good insight from Nikka
Image Description: Blue background with text that reads: So many [grad students] feel lonely at different times and in different ways. You’re making such a big leap from undergrad where everyone is basically in rhythm with one another, to graduate school where everyone is out of sync and working solo. It's a Lot!
This is so true. I saw my cohort in person for orientation and then I pretty much never saw them again. This was largely because I was living and working in another city and attending classes virtually. There just wasn't the same sense of shared space & time that college provided

A book of Awe
1/7/23
Email please
I loved this social media post as it so relevant to autism and with the idea of Crip Time. What is Crip Time
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Before you summon me to a meeting or ask to get on a quick call, please please see if we can have it over email or chat (text) or a google doc?
To those who ask if I can do speaking engagements, why can’t I do calls (legitimate question) – I script my webinars & talks in advance, practise intensely and even then its nerve wracking, but I do it because I can reach a larger audience.
Picture below is that of a kindred spirit







