Nothing to say, an afterthought puzzling oddity.

Nothing to say, an afterthought puzzling oddity.

Last week I won a prestigious fellowship for grad school with an alum that boasts students from elite schools across the US. It is a honor indeed to be recognized and selected and I am so over the top. 

In the cohort of 30 fellows, four Indian-American students won the fellowship which was mentioned in a few Indian newspapers as well. 

What I want to highlight is one specific Indian newspaper (not mentioning names here). There was plenty to say on the accomplishments of the other 3 non-disabled Indian-American students who are indeed quite accomplished. I am in deep admiration of their accomplishments. 

However, when it came down to talking about me,  it was like they were puzzled as to what to say around what my accomplishments were (if any). Other than Berkeley, graduating, disabled. I don't fit into their standard stereotype of the newsworthy nondisabled Indian-American student that makes it into a top school and probably has a dozen inventions or patents along the way. If I had been a nondisabled student helping the "usual objects of pity" disabled community with some invention, well that would have been newsworthy. It was like they were were struggling to write about this puzzling oddity of a disabled Indian student, who did not quite belong in their column, but would look bad for them if they left out altogether. 

The sad sad irony in all this is that this is a Bay Area paper. I was born and have lived in the Bay Area all my life. 

The point here is not my wanting more lines of mention around any accomplishment in an Indian newspaper. It's the feeling of being placed in the "other" group, of feeling that I don't "belong" in my own ethnic community. I felt quite sad.  

Should I be surprised? After all, growing up, I've pretty much been ignored and not included by the nondisabled Indian kids who lived on my street in a South Bay neighborhood dominated by Indian and Chinese kids. We lived on the same street but in different Marvel multiverses. I simply did not exist in their world. They did grace my doorstep exactly once a year, at Halloween, arms outstretched for their share of candy. Understandably, Halloween is my least favorite holiday as it is a painful reminder of non-inclusion. 

And lets not forget, in the not so distant past of 2015, the Gopal family in Sunnyvale had been sued by their neighbors and forced to move - one of the reasons being an autistic kid on the street reduced property values in the high priced Silicon Valley neighborhood. 

Of course I cannot generalize my entire community - There are exceptions and I am so appreciative of those "gems" who crossed paths with me.  

The point again of this whole piece- media representation matters. Else the stigma around disability will just continue from one generation to the next. 

Think about it. Given that autism is the fastest growing neuro-developmental disability of today, it is highly likely that a near and dear one of yours will have autism sometime in the near future. Is stigma and exclusion really what you want for that person you care about? 

Inclusion and reduction of stigma does not have to be an unattainable illusion. 

It can be a reality. Let's start on that today.