The Boy At the Back

An essay for my Eng 1A class

The Boy at the Back

(A Snapshot of America)

    Pens scratch words on paper as the students sit hunched over their desks. Other pens are lifted in mid-air as thoughts are pondered and organized in the canvas of the mind. The college classroom is quiet and the scent of concentration permeates the air. Some students sigh in relief at having finished their responses and get ready to leave.  A myriad of students sit in the room, some with last names not easily pronounceable by the instructor. The melting pot of culture and ethnicity that is America is reflected in this community college classroom. But what is even more striking is the presence of  the boy sitting in the back with significant disability challenges. That boy is me. I have non-verbal autism and a host of other issues. Yet here I am attending an advanced level English Composition college class.  This snapshot essentially shows the promise,  possibility, and opportunity inherent in America which now has transcended not just the barrier of ethnicity but also that of (dis)ability.

    The very fact that  a person with my level of challenges is able to attend college shows the promise of America. According to most reports by Psychologists and other professionals dated a few years back I was headed for an adult day program with college nowhere in the scene. I am non-verbal to start with. Add to that significant body disorganization, fine motor challenges, sensory dysregulation, and social anxiety. It was assumed I would not improve after the early intervention years of therapy during toddlerhood. Autism is just a label for the whole confused mix of disability and is wide in its scope.  In my case it’s a mind-body disconnect of sorts but I was being judged merely on external observations. I had no way to overturn established opinions of me as I had no avenue of communication. An intelligent rational mind was buried under the irrational body. I was wasting away my years in a special education classroom learning two-digit addition and three-letter words. I was still subject to the preschool circle-time in special education at age 12. Where was all this mentally stimulating education that the American dream spoke of? Lady Liberty was not delivering her promise to citizens like me. After high school I would be in one adult day program followed by another day program for older adults above age 50. I was doomed to a life of monotonous nothingness. I had wondered then if I would ever get the opportunity of attending a typical classroom. What a contrast from the snapshot above. For it was quite by accident that I stumbled onto learning to communicate via typing at age 13.  There was more to me than just an errant excitatory body which I could exhibit at last.  The road to mainstream education was not easily accessible and hard won for me. So that makes me appreciate it all the more. I  eagerly lapped up Algebra, Shakespeare, Programming, and Biology. I empathized with Frederick Douglass who had realized the power and possibility of education in turning our lives around. It was not easy to change perceptions of what someone like me was capable of either. I still have a host of autism issues to deal with which constantly throw obstacles in my everyday life. It is both a maze and an obstacle course every day as I walk on unchartered territory. It is a lot of hard work and requires much physical effort. I made it through high school garnering multiple writing awards on the way and even made valedictorian. Who would have imagined all that in my silent years? I’m now attending college in my own limited way. There I sit in the college classroom snapshot. And no doubt many others will follow after me and along with me. That is the promise of America.

    It takes a country like America with its  mindset to provide opportunities via support and infrastructure to make college a reality for someone with significant disability issues like me. I may have a bright mind but without understanding lecturers, guidance from college disability counselors, accommodations, and my other support staff, education may continue to be an elusive goal. The very fact that such options are available speaks volumes about American life. It enables someone like me to be part of that snapshot. That is the opportunity in America.

   I may be sitting at the back of the room but there lies the possibility that I too will come to the foreground as I find ways around my autism issues. My sitting at the back is symbolic in a way much like the slow and steady tortoise which caught up with the hare. Education is empowering as Frederick Douglass realized and can open up other hitherto closed doors.  In addition, disability itself does not have to be limiting as Dr. Stephen Hawking shows us in modern times. Given the neurodegenerative nature of his disability Dr. Hawking currently has to use cheek twitches to select one character at a time on the computer screen. The text then has to be converted to speech via a speech synthesizer. It is a slow process but Dr Hawking does not allow his disability to limit the brilliant output of his mind. Technology has been a great enabler and it can only continue to improve. We live in America which is in the forefront of technology. Dr. Hawking’s communication devices are powered by non other than Intel. The snapshot does not show it clearly but there is an iPad in front of me. That is my communication device, my mouth so to speak. Dare I dream that I will make it all the way to PhD on my path to education? There is the possibility that I can be part of the solution on my way. Education will enable me to become a productive and contributing member of society. That is the possibility in America.

    I see this promise, possibility, and opportunity in each and every person bent over their responses in the snapshot, not just me. That is why they are present in that room. That is why these students seek a college education.  This English Composition class is a transfer course requirement which implies a desire to pursue a bachelors degree. A college degree leads to better careers. It is the promise of America. In addition, the significantly lower costs of community college allow them to pursue this promise no matter their economic background. In fact, President Obama wants to make community college itself free. That is the opportunity in America.  And no longer is ethnicity a barrier to a better life if one pursues it with determination. The snapshot shows it all. That is the possibility of America.   

    At its crux, American life represents basic human life which has both ups and downs. Poverty, illness, housing, family, disability and other issues get in the way.  Life with its little details can be exhausting but it can be exhilarating too. The promise of positives is what keeps the human spirit going forward. For a peek at the promise, possibility, and opportunity of America just look the boy at the back.